Auditions are held at the Little Theatre, 726 Third Avenue, New Smyrna Beach. Copies of all scripts (except the musical) may be read at the Reference Desk at the New Smyrna Beach Library. Auditions are open and no experience is necessary. All auditions are at 7 p.m. Performances are at 8 p.m. except Sunday performances are at 2 p.m.

Season Opener
Sex Please, We're Sixty
Farce by Michael Parker and Susan Parker
Auditions: August 1 & 2
Performances: Sept. 10, 11, 12, 16, 17, 18 & 19
Director: Harriet Winokur

Setting: Rose Cottage Bed & Breakfast…somewhere in New England

Mrs. Stancliffe's Rose Cottage Bed & Breakfast has been successful for many years. Her guests (nearly all women) return year after year. Her next door neighbor, the elderly, silver-tongued, Bud "Bud the Stud" Davis believes they come to spend time with him in romantic liaisons. The prim and proper Mrs. Stancliffe steadfastly denies this, but really doesn't do anything to prevent it, and reluctantly accepts the fact that "Bud the Stud" is, in fact, good for business. Her other neighbor and would-be suitor, Henry Mitchell, is a retired chemist who has developed a blue pill called "Venusia," after Venus (the goddess of love) to increase the libido of menopausal women. The pill has not been tested. Add to the guest list three older women: Victoria Ambrose, a romance novelist whose personal life seems to be lacking in romance; Hillary Hudson a friend of Henry's who has agreed to test the Venusia, and Charmaine Beauregard, a "Southern Belle" whose libido does not need to be increased! When "Bud the Stud" gets his hands on some of the Venusia pills, the fun begins as he attempts to entertain all three women! But they soon discover that the pills have a strange effect on men: it gives them all the symptoms of menopausal women, complete with hot flashes, mood swings, weeping and irritability!

Characters (4W, 2M - ages 50's - 70's)

Bud Davis (age 70 plus) - The next-door neighbor to Mrs. Stancliffes' Rose Cottage Bed & Breakfast. He is weak, frail looking (the frailer the better), and appears at first glance to have "one foot in the grave." However, over the years, he has become renowned among the female guests as "Bud the Stud." He claims responsibility for the success of the bed & breakfast, believing all the females return year after year to see him. He enchants all of them with his silver tongue and sexual prowess. (Very elderly, somewhat infirm, chauvinistic, brazen, but likeable).

Mrs. Stancliffe (age 60 plus) - The owner of Rose Cottage Bed & Breakfast. She is a severe woman both in dress and manner. Precise in speech and punctuality, she gives the impression of efficiency and competence. She is intolerant of Bud's "Hanky-Panky" with her guests, but reluctantly has to agree he is good for business. Pursued by her next-door neighbor Henry, she refuses to let him into her life, until surprising events finally bring them together. (Sensible, practical, punctual, business like, menopausal, finally radiant and sensuous).

Henry Mitchell (age 60 plus) - A retired chemist and Mrs. Stancliffe's "Gentleman Caller." He is a mild mannered man who has proposed to Mrs. Stancliffe every afternoon for twenty years. He is always the perfect gentleman, and shows a great deal of respect for all the women around him. He has developed Venusia, a pill to increase the libido in menopausal women, but refuses to test it on moral grounds. Bud calls him, "a stick in the mud," and he probably is, but eventually comes out of his shell. (Gentle, caring, thoughtful, loveable).

Victoria Ambrose (age 50 plus) - Victoria is a renowned author who writes steamy romantic novels. She pines for romance in her personal life, but finds none. Flattered at first by Bud's attentions, she later sees him as the shallow, insincere Casanova that he really is and readily joins the plot to turn "Bud the Stud" into "Bud the Dud." (Pretty, serious, intelligent, menopausal).

Hillary Hudson (age 50 plus) - Hillary is beautiful, well educated, articulate and sophisticated in both manner and dress. She is an old friend and co-worker of Henry's, who agrees to test the Venusia pills. Initially skeptical of Bud's attentions, she gradually warms towards him, but is it the Venusia or Bud's charms? (Elegant, charming, best described as "A touch of class," intelligent and menopausal).

Charmaine Beauregard (age 50 plus) - Charmaine is the quintessential southern belle. She is definitely here at Rose Cottage for "Bud the Stud." Of all people, she does not need Venusia, as her entire life seems to be run by her overactive libido. However, she is a proud woman who will not be two-timed by Bud, and becomes the leading light in the plot to tame him. (Voluptuous, out-going, gushing, demonstrative, menopausal).


Auditions are open to the public, and stage experience is not necessary. Readings will be from the script and a copy is available at the reference desk at the New Smyrna Beach library. For add'l information contact the LT office at 386-423-1246 or e-mail info@NsbPlayers.org.